This is my 1000th blog post. I half-joked on Twitter yesterday that I would try to resist writing a traditional ultra-introspective narcissistic missive. But the truth is, reaching a personal milestone is an appropriate time (and a good excuse) to reflect upon what the hell I've been doing and how I want to proceed.
The current situation is certainly very different than when I started. In March 2008, Botgirl Questi was an unknown pseudonymous nube wandering around Second Life. The blog was a personal journal recording my in-world experiences. It had about a half-dozen sporadic readers, most of whom I'd met previously in Second life. Everything was new and fresh. Fascinating insights materialized at every turn. Virtual life was numinous. The exploration of virtual identity seemed like a religious calling.
In April, an article in New World Notes bumped my readership from the dozens into the thousands. I responded to the new exposure by increasing the pace and intensity of my virtual world activities and creative output. In May, I joined a community of digital people who believed they were transcending the limitations of the atomic world and setting the stage for the next step of human evolution. I held my first identity-themed art show in September and then presented at Second Life's first Comic-Con the following month. I began collaborating with other virtual creatives on new comics, videos and art shows. The sky seemed no limit.
Just a couple months later, in January 2009, I was ready to bail out. This Wheels on the Bus video is a good representation of my psychological state at the time.
I'd been burning the candle at both ends for almost a year and there was little left. My virtual community was starting to unravel. By June, most of my closest compatriots had disappeared off the grid without a trace. I was ready to follow. The dream of virtual utopia was gone. It seemed like I had been running fast and hard, getting nowhere.
But then, out of the blue, the Muse stepped in and saved my virtual life by shifting my raison d'être from the exploration of identity to the expression of creativity. I am only understanding this in retrospect as I'm writing these lines. So I'm going to end the post here and marinate in the new realization for a while. I'll be back when I'm nice and juicy.